I apologize for the delay in blogging recently. I have had a whole lot on my plate lately, and we were also in the process of switching computers at the office. I appreciate the patience of my readers. I thought that it might be good to do a series on parenting, perhaps in anticipation of a future parenting class here at Peace Lutheran. It has been an idea I have long been wrestling with.
Train up a child in the way he should go;
even when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
Before I go on, I should write a disclaimer, that I am certainly not an expert on parenting, nor do I claim to be one. My hope is that as I work through some challenging parenting issues, it might be helpful to some parents as well as myself.
As a pastor, I frequently am reminded of the passage above from Proverbs 22. Most people who quote it to me are frustrated at seeing their adult children and/or grandchildren/great-grandchildren no longer attending church and worshiping God. Their frustration comes at the fact that they DID "train up their children in the way they should go."
While I understand thier frustrations, more than they know, it is not as simple as the Proverb makes it sound. What I think people are forgetting are actually a number of other factors involved. I see a lot of parents forcing thier children to come to confirmation. What kind of a message does "I had to do it so you have to do it too" send? I beleive that it sends a message that this really isn't important, but it's just something that you have to do, so jump through the hoops so we can mark this off the church-TO DO LIST. When confirmation day comes and goes, so does the worship attendance of many. What many parents don't know is that I can tell within the first two weeks of confirmation who is taking it seriously and who is not.
Another factor is that when their children grow up, they are making thier own choices and decisions. Sometimes, and in some cases often, those decisions are bad ones, or choices that lead to destruction or awful consequences. At the very least it is not what we would have them choose, but we say nothing to them because they are adults. My question is, are you no longer their parent? Do you feel like, "Well I have done the best I could at raising them, but they are on their own now, and I have to trust that they will start making better decisions"?
What about at home? It seems like much is left undone by parents who feel that the church will handle all things pertaining to faith. How many parents are praying with their children? It begins with the parents having a prayerful relationship with God. If that isn't happening, the chances are that thier children are not growing up learning how important and vital prayer is for their lives.
How about daily devotions? I realize that time constraints have taken hold of many families, and there doesn't seem to be enough time in the day for all the things we have to do. I am right there with you on that one! But according to the 1st commandment, is it right for us to try and maybe place God in some time slot, if there is even one available? Or should we make God our number one priority each and every day?
I can tell you this, and I know I am not alone in feeling this way...On days when I put God first in my life, and do devotions to start my day off, and pray about all the things on my mind and overflowing in my schedule, I have a whole lot less stress in knowing that God is there beside me, guiding my life and decisions.
Perhaps as parents, we should take a deeper look at some of these things I have mentioned, and put them into practice. If nothing else, it will serve to show our children just how important they are for our lives and faith.
Thank you for reading and God bless. More on Parenting and Faith tomorrow!
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